G.I. Joe: Retraction

May 24, 2012 | Poe

...body massage? Anyone?

In what has to be one of the strangest movie-related moves I can remember, Paramount has decided to push back G.I. Joe: Retaliation nearly a full year, to March 2013. The press release claims the delay is because Paramount suddenly, at nearly the literal last frigging minute, decided to redo the movie in 3D.

As Rob notes at TR, 3D does really well in foreign countries, so it’s just possible Paramount and/or Hasbro decided they could make even more money with the much-maligned post-production 3D conversion. (And for what it’s worth, the Rock’s claiming new scenes will be “designed” to take advantage of 3D.)

One thing’s for certain: very few people are buying the argument that this is being done solely to turn the movie into 3D. The studio had plenty of opportunities to make that decision and evidently passed every time – at least until Battleship sank (which anyone could have seen coming a mile away).* (more…)

MOTUC Bio Discussion #59 > Star Sisters

May 24, 2012 | Poe

Inspired by He-Man.org’s Roast Gooble Dinner podcast, welcome to PGPoA’s latest MOTUC Bio Discussion!

Star Sistersâ„¢ Bios

Starlaâ„¢, Bright and Beautiful Leaderâ„¢
Real Name: Gemma,

Jewelstarâ„¢, Hidden Beautyâ„¢
Real Name: Devena

Tallstarâ„¢, Lovely Lookoutâ„¢
Real Name: Cassandra

In ancient times, an evil sorceress became jealous of the Star Sisters’ youth and beauty and trapped them in a shooting star. It was sent hurling through the cosmos until the three women crash-landed on Etheria. There, they remained magically confined in the side of a mountain until the day Swiftwind’s hooves accidently loosened the stone that concealed their prison. She-Ra quickly used her powers to melt away the star that held them captive. In gratitude, the sisters pledged their everlasting friendship. Jewelstarâ„¢ magically conjures gem armor to protect herself and others. Tallstarâ„¢ uses her magic to stretch to unbelievable lengths. Starlaâ„¢, with her pet Glorybird, can sense danger and project spells of light against her foes. Together, they stand side-by-side with She-Ra in the battle for freedom.

Not a whole lot to discuss here, is there? An origin story, a description of the characters and so on. I’m trying, but I just can’t find anything interesting to say about this bio.

These bio discussions have really lost a lot of their appeal, haven’t they? I think they work better in a live format, like the actual Roast Gooble podcasts. Then you usually get one person willing to play the devil’s advocate enough to make it interesting.

MOTUC Bio Discussion Archive

PGPoA’s Guide to Third Party Transformers Products

May 23, 2012 | @abuddah

With Playmates’ announcement of a new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle line based on the 1980s cartoon, the circle of nostalgia for the toy industry is just about complete. The TMNT, Snake Eyes, He-Man, and Luke and Leia have come and gone a few times since the ’80s, but one property has always had a spot on the shelf: the Transformers. Kids love cars, robots and the idea of getting two toys for the price of one. (On the other hand, there are the Go-Bots…)


I certainly loved my original Transformers toys, but even back then I could tell something was amiss. The robots who waged war on my carpet in the afternoon didn’t look exactly like the ones battling over the fate of the planet on TV. The designers had taken quite a bit of creative license in order to get the Autobots and Decepticons into streamlined character models that would be easy to animate. (more…)

Poe’s Point > Did Storage Wars Stage a Big Action Figure Find?

May 22, 2012 | Poe

Dr. Mrs. Ghostal and I got into the A&E show Storage Wars a few weeks ago. I’ve never been one for these reality shows – I’ve never watched Antiques Roadshow or Pawn Stars or American Pickers and hell, even that one Toy Hunters episode has been sitting on my DVR, unwatched, since January or whenever it aired. But after a comment from Power Pal Ben Leach, I decided to watch a few eps of SW and got hooked.

Of course, like many such shows, you can find no shortage of Internet commentary claiming it’s entirely staged – particularly an episode in which some buyers, Jarrod and his wife Brandi, discover an extremely valuable cache of vintage Mego Super Heroes. There’s a thread about it at the Mego Museum and the consensus is that it was entirely staged; one fellow claims to know the collector who “donated” the figures to the show. (more…)

Toy Aisle Trolls > Transformers Crime

May 22, 2012 | Poe

Toy Aisle Trolls is a feature highlighting acts of vandalism to in-store toy items. If you find a ruined package, a stolen figure, a swapped-out figure, or any other such acts, take a photo (cell phone photos are fine if they’re not blurry) and email them to poe@poeghostal.com.

Submitted by: SL

Should look like:

Poe’s Note: I think the orange in SL’s pics is due to the photo, not the packaging or troll activity.

MOTUC Bio Discussion #58 > Battleground Evil-Lyn

May 22, 2012 | Poe

Inspired by He-Man.org’s Roast Gooble Dinner podcast, welcome to PGPoA’s latest MOTUC Bio Discussion!

Battleground Evil-Lyn Bio
Real Name: Evelyn Morgan Powersâ„¢

Cast aside by her secret husband after his transformation, Evil-Lyn sent their infant son into the future and plotted to overthrow Skeletor by releasing his enemies from their dimensional prisons. In a series of miscalculations, she helped free the Snake Menâ„¢, Hordak and Gygorâ„¢ — increasing her adversaries threefold! After Randor and Miro returned from Despondosâ„¢, the Three Towers rose and Evil-Lyn found herself again allied with Skeletor during the Second Ultimate Battleground. At the end, defeated and stripped of her powers by the new Sorceress of Grayskullâ„¢, Evil-Lyn used the Cosmic Keyâ„¢ and the Power of Central Tower to return to the future to find a new life with her long lost child — The Son of Skeletor!

Quite a bit of new information in this bio. First, we learn for certain that Evil-lyn actually married Skeletor at some point, albeit secretly, and they even had a kid. I’m a little unclear on how the events proceeded, but my guess is Evil-lyn got pregnant by Keldor, had the child secretly (probably after Keldor was transformed into Skeletor), sent it into the future (probably with the aid of her father, the Faceless One), then remained an Evil Warrior and began unleashing all of Skeletor’s enemies into the world, each of which backfires on her.

At the Second Ultimate Battleground newly-minted Sorceress Teela strips Evil-lyn of her powers, but she uses the Cosmic Key (doesn’t anyone ever keep an eye on that?) and goes to the future with “the Son of Skeletor.”

The “Son of Skeletor” plot thread may be a reference to “He-Ro, Son of He-Man,” a rejected 1996 cartoon pitch by Lou Scheimer Productions to bring back the He-Man franchise. The cartoon would have featured a teenager named Dare, a ward of King Adam, who could turn into the He-Man-like “He-Ro” using the Power Sword. If you skim through the pitch’s bible (via the link above), you’ll see there’s a lot of talk about the mystery of Dare’s parents. However, Mattel’s Scott Neitlich confirmed that Dare is not the son of Skeletor – which makes sense, since that would have been far too interesting a plot point for these bios.

MOTUC Bio Discussion Archive